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Your Prayers


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    Tuesday, June 28, 2005

    The Sparrow Song

    Almighty God, so wonderful,
    he stirs the raging seas
    he blows the peaceful wind

    Almighty God, so powerful
    he turns the darkest night
    into the light of day
    over and over again

    And if one little sparrow falls,
    and one of his children cries,
    the Lord who is over all,
    he understands the reason why

    And even the smallest prayer,
    he hears and meets the need,
    the Lord who is everywhere,
    and still is there

    for you, and me



    maybe you should just take some time and reflect on the meaning of the words in the song... how true indeed, that the Lord answers even the smallest prayer...

    which he has proven to me time and time again

    Monday, June 27, 2005

    oh well... the philosophical first day of school has come and gone =/

    i think last night impacted me quite a lot... this is what happened...

    i have just finished blogging on my reflections for the holidays, in a sense talking to God...

    then i hear a nice song on my music player then i decided to play my guitar and worship till past twelve; into the new term

    just as i am setting up the equipment my mom comes in and sees that the comp is still on, even though its as good as off because i wont be using it anymore. she gets pissed and yells at me. i tell her that i was doing my reflections, she says why didnt i do my work earlier?

    she stomps out of my room without saying good night

    i sit there with the guitar in my hands, so overcome with sadness that i totally lose my mood to play anymore... i was really upset

    so i just sit there, then this really peculiar thing happened...

    my fingers just started plucking

    like wow... i dont know but i think like i expressed my feelings through my fingers subconciously as i was too upset even to say a proper prayer to ask for comfort and understanding... perhaps i also talked to God through it?

    i ended up just doing that for an hour, sitting in my chair, staring blankly at nowhere in particular, sometimes closing my eyes, but the music carried on

    oh well i dont know but i'm just getting so tired that my mom wont even let me explain and just jumps to conclusions.. fancy yelling at me over something like that and when i am just feeling so emotional

    i hate it

    but at least i didnt go to sleep angry

    Sunday, June 26, 2005

    Reflections

    okay the end of the hols has come... so sad, but i guess its time to reflect

    i think i shall address my spiritual growth...

    so i got into the music team and will be playing this sunday for youth sunday, i am going to do my best to glorify God through playing and God alone since he called me to do this and gave me the oppurtunity...

    thank you Lord

    i also realised that listening to nothing but christian music has made it so easy to put God in every part of my life... so now i make an effort to listen and actually think abut the lyrics and how they can relate to me and my relationship with Him.

    i guess the Lord has shown me the way and quite a few signs as to what i should do with my life... maybe i am slowly starting to see that life really isnt that pointless... and that i live to worship God and to live according to his will... which in order to do i made the most heart wrenching decision

    theres pain in the offering indeed

    i guess all these things like christian music are really not wrong in themselves, it's just the attitude we take towards them. all christian songs are after all... praising God, nevermind who sings it or whatever, it all comes down to the song itself. i used to hate hymns so much, but now i see that they still praise God no matter how much i dislike them for various stupid reasons, so i dont shun them anymore

    thank you Lord for showing me the way

    however i still have my doubts... well in terms of schoolwork i dont think it was a holiday well spent, i didnt really catch up on most of my subjects like i should... i just hope that God will make a way for me

    like he has always done.

    Dear Lord,

    I thank you for this time of holiday and free time you have given me father
    thank you for revealing to me more of what your plan for me is
    thank you even for the bad times father than you have helped me turn those to my advantage
    I thank you that you have helped me grow more in your faith father, that i may no longer doubt your plans for me

    I just pray that you will help me be focused on you father as i worship you this coming sunday, that i will worship You and You alone, and truly that i may have a heart of worship as i come into Your Presence father

    I thank you for this oppurtunity that you have given me just to offer what i have to You

    Thank you for everything You've done in me Lord, thank you for showing me your way and showing me that it is not easy to follow

    but You have helped me along

    For all You've done father,

    i thank you

    in Your Son's most precious and holy name,

    amen

    Saturday, June 25, 2005

    bleargh

    yet another eventful day, but before i carry on about the MRT SAGA i shall briefly describe some stuff...

    mr azmi is good at insulting people while making it funny and smiling all the way and making it sound like a joke.

    example:

    azmi: "Christine looks like a horse"
    dunno who: "aah sir you are so bad, i thought you said she looked like a man"
    azmi: "but eric seems to be insulted"
    dunno who: "so you're saying that its an insult to men by saying that Christine looks like them?"
    azmi: "no i thought that eric was feeling insulted ont eh behalf of the horses"

    OR SOMETHING LIKE THAT.. -.-/^^

    and that kaijun is easily defeated... fire against fire indeed ;)

    okay now on to....

    THE MRT STATION

    bleh i really dunno how to describe this, such an experience!

    okay i was with daryl and we got off city hall station

    what do we see? a bunch of people... no wait make that a HORDE of people crowding onto the train on the other side of the train

    the train cant leave as people are half in half out of the train, thus resulting in daryl and eric having to sit and wait and watch.. but guess what?

    we dont feel impatient, angry or frustrated at any of this, rather, we get amused and interested

    so we just sit there and watch this interesting spectacle of humans

    and watch

    and watch

    and watch

    soon a man sitting close to us starts talking to us about the train and stuff, guess he heard our musing... thus he makes a bet with daryl

    whether the train would leave empty or packed

    after more and more waiting, the train finally leaves...

    packed like sardines... i mean like, if the train doors were to open the person closest to the door would BOUNCE OUT

    so therefore daryl earns a dollar... HAHA

    second train comes and the same thing happens, though on a much smaller scale

    then finally when the third one comes we pile in and everything

    and we go home

    hooray

    sigh it was such a memorable experience that i would really like to do it all over again ;)





    *disclaimer: okay i am a horrible describer.. these kind of things are very difficult to describe because yo must actually be THERE to experience it properly and understand.... maybe daryl can do a better job =) *

    Friday, June 24, 2005

    this happened a long time ago (well maybe not too long) but its still very important to me

    spec course

    i prayed for efficiency and not to waste time so much on the last day

    we ended an hour earlier than usual

    we didnt have to waste time standing around doing nothing as we we not allowed to do drill where we usually conducted our parades

    basically minimal time wasted


    God answers even the smallest prayers indeed

    Thursday, June 23, 2005

    okay after much pondering i have decided to talk about this whole christian music controversy and worship

    again.

    firstly, worship =/= songs

    we go to church to worship God, but not to sing don't we?

    worship is, or rather should be what we do every single second of our lives. because that's the reason we were created, or so i believe... that God created man in His own image to worship Him, and i know that may sound narcisstic but even if it is isn't God justified in wanting to be worshipped? after all he's done.... ^^

    by simply saying a short prayer before you go to sleep or even saying grace you are already worshipping God, like you are acknowledging His presence and thanking him... which brings me to my next point on prayer.

    this is how you should pray (before you sleep):

    Adoration
    - this is to thank Him for the knowledge you acquire that day, assuming you did your qt

    Confession
    - self explanatory, bring all your sins to God and ask Him for forgiveness

    Thanksgiving
    - just to thank God for everything, and really everything, even thank Him for just being alive so that you may pray to Him

    Supplication
    - this is to pray for others, people than need His touch, or other reasons, often neglected, which really shouldnt be

    oh well not saying you MUST pray using the ACTS method but its a good guideline, but back to the subject on music and songs as worship.

    to me, using music as a tool to worship God is a wonderful thing. it is very engaging and you remember things a lot better. like if a verse was quoted in a song then it would stick in your head better wouldnt it? but due to this, the words in a song of worship have a big responsibility; the song writers responsibility.

    that is why every song is special in its own right. i assume each song was written out of inspiration. therefore each song has a special meaning to its songwriter, and it is shared with everyone. which is why some people find songs meaningful and some dont.

    but there's always been this controversy over people worshipping themselves when they are supposed t be worshipping God and God alone. well i suppose if one is referring to christian groups like hillsong and planetshakers, what i can see is a group of people, who are musically talented, and use their talents to worship and praise God.

    that is exactly what we should do, since God gave us each our own special talents and we should use them to serve him with everything we've got.

    no doubt there will be people who play and totally forget the purpose. i myself am guilty of that sometimes, when jamming to a christian song, i feel bad when i stop singing along, and pay more attention to the technical aspect.

    i know everyone says that the most important thing in worship is the heart of worship itself. it is so true. and essentially the point is that instruments are redundant in that context.

    both are true, but how many people actually get into the heart of worship on the spot? maybe they are influenced by external surroundings or whatever... but my point is this, that instruments are to create an environment such that it is easier for people to have a real heart of worship and reach the so called "spiritual high" when you get chills and all that stuff

    i believe those chills are caused by the touch of God when you go into His presence while worshipping Him... oh well i dont know if i'm wrong but i cant find a suitable explanation.

    oh well my point after talking so much is that worship is not about everyone else, you shouldnt be affected on who they worship, or what. the point is that its all about YOU and who YOU worship.


    if you read all that and didnt dismiss it i really thank you.

    i know i'm not the best person to be talking about this kind of thing, since people see me as a disgrace to christians and to God himself

    i know that some of you think i'm a hypocrite

    give me a chance

    and once again if you actually read it properly

    thank you

    Wednesday, June 22, 2005

    let's see, today was a RATHER EVENTFUL day which has A LOT to blog about but since eric can play half life at nine and since eric needs to desperately catch up, eric shall not blog

    EXCEPT THIS

    simply put in a nutshell

    total distance travelled from dropping kenny to reaching tiong bahru plaza: 29571040 km

    total displacement: 0 km

    number of times eric gave suggestions to mr azmi: 59170

    number of times mr azmi repeated those suggestions and remarks: 59170

    THEREFORE, number of times eric was left speechless but then started wailing in despair shortly afterward: 59170

    go figure

    bye bye i'm off to save the world

    Tuesday, June 21, 2005

    after an msn convo with saryl toray i have realiser that there are so many worfs that can be usew when your hanx has a wisability to type the letter A/B/C/E/F/G/H/I/J/K/L/M/N/O/P/Q/R/S/T/U/V/W/X/Y/Z

    oh well if i sisnt make any sense i apologise and would refer you to our cear saryl for more information

    ARGH I HATE MY SAMN HANF

    -.- sheesh

    eric had a fever yesterday and therefore eric couldnt go for stupid spec course land module

    whoopdee-doo for eric overall

    later in the day eric discovers that by playing half life his condition improves

    or maybe it was the panadol

    or maybe it was reading revenge of the sith

    oh well

    eric has been skipping breakfast to lose weight

    hahaha

    eric hates chinese

    surprise surprise

    bleh

    angst angst angst....

    Sunday, June 19, 2005

    right i think i've been darn bitchy throughout the whole june hols...

    blame it on ncc

    Mood now: simply SIAN

    ripping once again is a really crappy experience

    Thursday, June 16, 2005

    yay reuben morgan worship was great!

    hmmm except it was a little too loud so had to sing extra loud so that you can hear yourself

    resulted in sore throat

    haha

    oh well i didnt really like the pastors as they kept talking about physical stuff like the abilities of the music team and money that was needed to bring them here...

    doesnt really matter does it?

    okay since stupid kaijun has been complaining that this blog is like DEAD... like so is everyone elses so like... HAH

    =)

    i hate ncc and its stupid inefficiency

    should i rant?

    no

    why?

    cause it is very early in the morning and i have to submit myself to wasting 10 hours PLUS PLUS PLUS (PLUS PLUS PLUS....) due to stupid unreliable ncc dismissal times

    oh well

    -.-

    hate

    Sunday, June 12, 2005

    "the world takes us in front of a silver screen and says, 'this is love'
    God takes us to a tree where a man hangs, bloodied and torn, and says, 'This Is Love'"


    how meaningful indeed

    Thursday, June 09, 2005

    i am sian EVERYDAY

    crap

    okay things i have done so far

    -consulted jason chan for four hours
    -learnt solo part and everything else for "i believe in a thing called love"
    -ate enitre sarah lee pound cake today

    -i hate dell
    -i hate the 7-10 working days policy
    -i hate my dad's comp's wireless connection
    -i hate unreliability

    i am watching lost and therefr cannot be bothered to say anything substantial

    sean wants me to dedicate this blog post to him

    BAH

    Saturday, June 04, 2005

    okay i have about five minutes to blog about quite a few days

    -youth camp, blah not as fun as last years.... quite a let down, oh well... i screwed up A LOT of things... dont ask

    -i just realised that there was nothing much in the past few days

    -my comp finally screwed itself beyond repair and i'm getting a new one ONLY NEXT WEEK... so damn screwed up right, like half the holidays gone already

    -zen micro also screwed, got a new one but have to replace ALL the darn songs.... and no it is actually QUITE A LOT

    i was pondering in the car today and realised that letting go is a complicated thing....

    like letting an animal go off into the wild

    it rips your heart apart at first but you realise that it's better off

    and you are happy about it

    okay five minutes is up

    bye bye

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